T o be honest, I didn’t really know what to expect when I first got this Cayman. Since this is the first true sports car I’ve ever had, there aren’t many cars I can compare it to. Actually, read the word ‘many’ as ‘none’.

Past experience has been linked to a Fiat Panda (yes, I am that old), Fiat Uno, Ford Fiesta, Honda Civic, Mitsubishi Galant, Pajero and a Chevrolet Caprice. I drove the hell out of all of them and I must admit that the old Caprice, with all its oil-tanker features, was the most entertaining to drive. It was very heavy, terribly unbalanced, horribly underpowered and incredibly unresponsive. And yet, once I hit 35,000 kilometres and the rear tyres started to lose their grip, this sorry (albeit exceedingly comfortable) excuse of a car became a ballerina on every roundabout. It was glorious fun.

The Porsche, however, has a much, much higher limit. And I’ve been pushing it to that limit. Now, after only half the kilometres I covered in the Caprice, my tyres are starting to wave goodbye. It is still fun, mind you, but far more dangerous.

If you push it a bit too much in the corner, it understeers. Ease up on the throttle and the tail mimics the one in an old 911. Sure it’s not that bad if you know what you’re doing, and it’s probably what any decent driver would expect from my car, even on fresh rubber. But I’m not the most competent driver. So, I have started shopping around for new rubber. I’ve come across a few unpleasant surprises…

Firstly, my friends at Bridgestone do not have the size I need. It’d have to be a special order, they said. And we all know what that means in this country. You wait a couple of months, calling them daily, and in the end you find out that someone forgot to ship them but they can airfreight them for you and, no problem, you will get them at $ 400 each – in a couple of weeks. For sure, this time.

Pirelli and Michelin do have the size the Cayman S needs, but at $ 435 a-piece. That is going to mean the very unwelcome, very damaging and very unpleasant disbursement of around $ 1740. Where are all the rest of the tyre manufacturers? I don’t know.

Perhaps I should’ve guessed I had it coming. A daily smile in a car never comes cheap. I mean, I paid only a touch over $ 200 for the first service a couple of months ago, and it’s well known that cheap maintenance in a Porsche is an oxymoron.

You can probably hear me groaning right now.