With fast and responsive steering, it’s perfectly predictably

My long odyssey of acquiring this car started on June 18, 2008. My Birthday. As it happens, my native Spain was on its way to win it’s first international title since football became a sport (and quite possibly the last one for the next hundred and thirty years). Earlier that day, I placed my order and gave the down payment to the friendly people at Al Nabooda Automobiles for a brand new Cayman S.

“Delivery in September or October” they said at that time. In August they confirmed that there’d been a delay somewhere and that the car would now be ready in November. At the time they were quite sure of this.

Of course, in September, they changed the delivery date once again and promised that the final date (which they seemed to be willing to carve into stone) would be December. At the time, the rumours of a new Direct Injection system made me voluntarily give up the order and then renew Ð this time for the 2009 Cayman. The fourth revised delivery date would be February and, they swore over Moseley’s code of conduct, that my car would be one of the first to roll out of the factory.

February comes and goes, and still no car. By now, having given up my company car, I am driving a battered 1.3-litre Mitsubishi Lancer which, despite its immaculate reliability record, was not really the car I had set my eyes on.

The price for the new Cayman was still the same but the options are a bit more expensive. $ 30 extra for the same seats, $ 15 more for the mats, and a whopping $ 400 higher for the Xenon headlamps. Looks like inflation hit hard on the options this year.

In the end, after the car had been featured in every magazine on the planet and the reviews had been translated into countless languages, I received my Cayman. So much for it being ‘one of the first cars to roll out of the factory’.

After bending over backwards and jumping through hoops way smaller than my waist in order to get my financing approved by our trusted banks, I jump into my partially owned vehicle on March 18 Ð nine months exactly to the day from down payment to delivery. No wonder I have such a father-son feeling about it.

So, now I have a 320bhp car that weights 1375kg (with a 75kg driver, which means 1390kg with me inside). Cost: $ 61,660.

I understood early on that the navigation system would not work when 50 per cent of the roads are changed within a year, and that a Bluetooth feature that my phone seems to have is certainly beyond the scope of any technology I am either prepared or willing to ever understand.

Add to this that, to my ears, the Bose system sounds like a 70s garage band during a jamming session after a heavy night of drinking, it meant I ordered the standard, low-spec radio. The best option of all however, was the PDK. After being a hardcore manual gearbox traditionalist, it has finally won me over. And I cannot tell you just how much I love it.

Unfortunately I truly forgot to get the limited slip differential. Shame on me. And I passed on the prospect of the Chrono Package as, for me, the amount of money being asked on a stop-watch and a launch control system is hardly justifiable; my aim is cornering, finesse and control, not drag racing.

As for the performance... well, my opinion is ineffable, so it cannot be fully expressed in words. The acceleration is a progressive and steady push. Not a kick, not a breeze, but a steady, formidable and tremendously pleasurable push. It is available from 4200rpm all the way up to 6300, and since the PDK changes gears in 0.2sec, it does not jerk.

The suspension is, again, superb.  A bit hard on those useless speed bumps I hate so much, but very efficient on turns. Combined with the precise, fast and responsive steering, and with such a good weight balance, the car is perfectly predictable. It understeers when you expect it to and it will take a nutter at the wheel to make it oversteer with the traction control on.

Being the irresponsible person I have managed to become, when I turn the PSM off the sensation is even better. Oversteer is predictable, controllable, fun and not too scary. The feeling is that of being one with the car, transparent sensations on what it is capable of and how far or close you are to the limit.

I’ll go back to the PDK. This transmission, except in very special and obvious occasions, does what you want, when you want it to. No more second-guessing the driver. It obeys on command and although the positioning and shifting method might be confusing and intrusive at the beginning, it becomes easy and natural after the first 1000km. I cannot forget to mention that the sound of the downshifts is delicious. The automatic mode is also very good and immediately senses how you intend to drive. It reacts seamlessly in turn. And all this is coming from a guy who used to pity any Tiptronic Porsche owner.

I think I should also cover how comfortable a daily ride it is and that it has two separate storage spaces, but such dull information is certainly of no interest to you, so I will pass.

My biggest regret is that after waiting for this baby for over nine months, dreaming about it every night, I, as the owner, cannot experience the intimacy of seeing the car’s innards. Apparently, accessing the engineering marvel that constitutes the heart of my machine is a privilege reserved to people with grease on their hands and the closest I can get to the engine is the oil cap.

Finally, there’s one last question to be answered, and that’s if I got anything in exchange for my patience. The answer is yes; I got a free car cover, an apologetic sales rep and a nice story to tell my kid when he inherits the car in about 20 years...