Step into the Scirocco and you’re greeted with comfort and a strong sense of Eos interior

When the automotive history books about the 21st century are written, the chapter of ‘Icons’ is going to be crammed full of statistical information that’ll try to justify one car or another when icon status isn’t measured by mere numbers.

Sales figures are all very good but they’re not the yardsticks. True icons are few and far between; their copies and subsequent incarnations endless. You only have to look at the number of Caterham 7 and AC Cobra-based machines produced around the world. But who knows, perhaps imitation is the sincerest form of flattery after all.

So what about those icons that began great and have had their genes modified and renewed by their own family in order to capitalise on their greatness and on capitalism itself? The ones you would’ve loved to own had you been older at the time? Of course the reference is to the two in these pictures: the never-ending MINI and the resurrected Scirocco, who both having been adapted for the modern age, must live up to the reputation of the precedent-setting originals that came before them. A tough job by any standards - especially for the Scirocco, which has to prove itself on Middle East soil; it’s the first time we’ve been able to get our hands on it here, after all. So let’s start the scrutinising. We’ll begin with the Scirocco, as in Viper Green it’s the more striking and newer car.

The looks are a little subjective. Head on it’s aggressive and has the nose of a more powerful sports car. Side on it’s sporty with it’s high shoulders, and at the back it goes a little soft. That thick rear bumper together with the small rear hatch makes it less interesting and doesn’t match the front for visual solidity. Plus, overall, it isn’t as satisfying to look at as the IROC concept of 2006; a slight disappointment considering looks are so important in this ‘small coupé’ market.

As for the MINI’s looks, we don’t have to bother. It’s never been mistaken for anything else and it’s more recognisable than Barack Obama these days. So onwards with the important bit – the driving.

At this point, it’s probably right to remember the MINI’s capabilities. It’s quite easy really, to forget just how good it is. In Cooper S form it’s a very capable car, and the reason why we’ve featured it on evo’s pages so many times before. From the moment you set your bottom low in the seat to the moment you first turn the wheel, you can sense what this car is all about. It’s short, sharp, precise and fun. The steering and brakes are super-alert, it moves with your intentions instead of moments after you’ve decided to turn and although the saying in motoring circles ‘it handles like a go kart’ might be a bit overused, the MINI comes close.

The 175bhp engine of the ‘07 car matched to the twin-scroll turbocharger develops max power at 5500rpm but you get a lot of consistent torque above 1700rpm, so torque steer can be an issue. It’s not ideal but reflects the Cooper S’s character – it wants to go somewhere. It feels like it’s making good use of its every horsepower. More importantly, it feels faster than the 197bhp Scirocco.

‘The Cooper S’s steering and brakes are super-alert; it moves with your intentions’

It might feel it, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it is. Both will reach 100kph in 7.1sec and the Scirocco has the edge in terms of torque by 14lb ft and in speed by 8kph. Away from a drag strip it’s more or less the same story: grip levels are almost identical in both. The difference comes in their modus operandi. BMW’s set-up has given the little MINI a very live front end that can dart from point to point and a very excited rear that’s happy to cock an inside wheel at the limit and equally happy to break traction beyond it. It doesn’t just make it feel exciting, it also means you can easily modulate the direction of the front and rear with your right foot.

Not that you ever need to. The ‘S’ works not so much as a reaction to your inputs but more as part of them. It’s a bit of a contrast, especially when you step out of it and take the wheel of the People’s Car, where you’re greeted with a comfortable seat and then a strong sense of Eos interior. As the famous phrase goes, familiarity breeds contempt. So it’s probably a good thing we’re not on one of the UAE’s many flat and predictable stretches of tarmac.

The windiest roads in Fujairah – where we’ve chosen to have fun and make best use of these two supposed ‘fun cars’ – have both a consistency and irregularity to them. Newly laid roads are smooth and feature the medium- to long-speed corners you can build a flow on. But some of the older and quieter roads we came across are rougher and really bring out the true chassis of the two cars. The areas are best explored during a weekend when you can discover the more interesting roads that twist between mountains and feature large undulations. One crucial tip is to check the weather: when we visited it looked like we’d just missed a sandstorm, which ends up leaving a haze in the air that limits visibility and takes away the view of the yellow and orange mountains that surround you.

The Scirocco has the same 2578mm wheelbase as the Golf on which it shares a platform, but it’s wider, longer and a whole 97mm lower, which you wouldn’t be able to tell from a glance at its profile, given the apparently large gap between each wheel and arch. The MINI fills its boots much better.

Those more technically minded still might want to know of other promising details like longer front and rear tracks with front MacPherson struts and multi-link rear suspension, not to mention that it all weighs 30kg less. Even if you’re not an automotive engineer, it still sounds good. These are mostly numbers, though. All of these statistics don’t really add up in the sense that there’s not so much of a difference that you notice a whole new car to the Golf GTi; you need to be paying some attention.

The Scirocco’s interactions between car and driver in a tight corner go something like this. The steering isn’t as positive so you turn with more lock than you would in the MINI, trust the car’s stiff chassis; understeer builds gradually with the chirrup of the tyres slowly getting louder, the front begins to wash wide, lift off the throttle, understeer gradually reduces, the nose slowly towards the apex, the tyres are no longer in pain and you power out.

In the MINI, lift off the throttle mid-corner and the nose doesn’t so much as tuck in as dive in. A step back on the accelerator mid-corner brings it straight back up to pace and instantly gets the front tyres working hard. Correct it again with a lift or a dab on the brakes and again the car shifts and the tyres are suddenly at optimum grip again. Try some more right foot action again towards the exit and you’ll have the inside front wheel lifting and spinning.

This behaviour becomes especially pronounced when you drive on a long and winding downhill stretch, like the ones around Fujairah, where the corners come one after the other and you are playing the game of apex-to-apex-and-not-a-hint-of-straight-to-let-you-breathe. You quickly begin to realise it takes more measured inputs to get the best out of the MINI.

That’s why comparing the two is like comparing very old red wine to a rum-laced cocktail: both are very good and both are capable of the same thing (in this case making you drunk), but they’re made of different DNA. Even tugging on the handbrake on the Scirocco mid-corner won’t seriously upset the rear. The best demonstration of this is to look at the MINI on gravel and then at the Scirocco: even on a loose surface the VW is safer and more controlled – and less fun.

Where the Cooper S really looses out, however, is on ride and gearbox. The super-fast DSG system in the Scirocco is hard to falt at this price range. It’s only the fact that the system is programmed to change down so smoothly in auto mode that there’s no blip on downshifts which is disappointing. The MINI we tested was an automatic with push-and-pull controls/paddles. It felt fake from the first gear shift; like driving a car on a PlayStation game instead of the real thing. A manual really suits the MINI better and it’s far more satisfying to use. And before cries about resale values are yelled in this direction, it’s worth questioning what price you put on feeling more connected to the car. In terms of using the MINI like it’s a go kart, a manual ‘box is priceless.

As for the issue of ride, the MINI is noticeably harder: bumps are more pronounced and rebound is far quicker. You can get a lot out of this ‘S’ – just make sure the road is smooth. With the Scirocco, you don’t have so much to think about, because it just seems to go, whatever the undulations. The Adaptive Chassis Control’s three settings (Comfort/Normal/Sport) make for a more flexible car, but it’s hardly worth taking out of Sport mode.

There’s not much to split these two on vocals either. If you like something louder and more raucous, then the Cooper S is the one. If you like a more bassy note with a wider range of exhaust notes, then maybe the VW is the more appealing choice. It also has a deeper burble and makes a satisfying broken-up burping noise on upchanges.

‘You don’t have to think so much with the Scirocco - it just seems to go, whatever the undulations’

In terms of practicalities, there aren’t many in the MINI. It’s not made to carry huge loads and the rear seats can’t realistically be used by anyone older than five. As for the Scirocco’s rear, well it’s surprisingly roomy. From those window lines it might look like there’s hardly any space in the back, but two adults can actually fit there, as long as they’re not over 1.8m tall.

So what about that all important icon status? Have BMW and VW sold out and gone for financial glory? For the MINI it’s clear: it’s been loved all over and has achieved ‘cool’ status years ago. As for the Scirocco, it’s no doubt VW has made a brilliant car worthy of praise. Whether it’ll manage to go beyond being just ‘a very good Golf variant’ is another question.

What it comes down to in the end in this price range is which one delivers more overall as a package. The Cooper S is a pleasure to own and good for a blast for almost everyone, almost all of the time. What wins it for the Scirocco though, is that it’s the more complete car for the money and manages to be a good drive at the same time. Not just sometimes, but always.

	VW Scirocco	Mini Cooper S
Engine	In-line 4-cyl, turbocharged	In-line 4-cyl, turbocharged
Location	Front, transverse	Front, transverse
Displacement	1984cc	8354cc
Max power	197bhp @ 5100rpm	172bhp @ 5500rpm
Max torque	207lb ft @ 1700rpm	192lb ft @ 1700-5000rpm
Transmission	Six-speed double-clutch gearbox, front-wheel drive	Six-speed automatic tiptronic gearbox, front-wheel drive
Weight (kerb)	1298kg(est)	1130kg
Power-to-weight	152bhp/ton	155bhp/ton
0-100kph	7.1sec(claimed)	7.1sec (claimed)
Top speed	233khp(claimed)	225kph (est)
Basic price	c $ 31,000	c $ 35,000
On sale	Now	Now